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Surreal Life - Soundtrack Included
It is going to be a very strange day. It started with being introduced to a co-worker�s kids as Miss Jennifer. They aren�t Ill Jill�s kids, but at 8:52 am I heard her offering them a slice of pizza leftover from yesterday�s lunch. Now I love me some cold pizza in the AM, but I would never offer that to someone else�s kids. Hello growing bones and muscles??? Anywho, someone decided to blare the instrumental version of a variety of awful Dizknee songs from their mini computer speakers and when �Can you Feel the Love Tonight� came on, I screamed out �NOOOO!� and donned my gigantic headphones. This gives me the opportunity to continue my project of rating all of the songs in my music library so I can rid myself of the crappy songs. Wheel in the Sky � Journey � 5 stars.
I had a real corporate moment just a few minutes ago. I was typing and email and needed to come up with a response that was filed away in one of my color coded folders. While reading a memo someone had placed in my inbox, I wheeled my chair backwards and without looking up, thumbed through my files until I found the correct folder, and then propelled myself back towards my desk and computer. Shit like that reminds me that I am getting old and responsible. Love Goes On Anyway � Go Betweens � 4 stars.
Last night, I met the Snow Princess and Mo out for a few drinks at a local chain restaurant. Over a few glasses of poison, we solved the world�s issues, sorted out concerns over child care and travel and the division of household duties. As the happy hour crowd left, a new and unexpected crowd filtered in to the bar area. Suddenly, I looked up and realized we were surrounded by a large group of 22 year olds looking to hook up. One particularly flashy waifish girl was wearing a fuchsia Alicia Keys style hat, white J-Lo plunging neckline sheer top and bright turquoise blue Christina Aguilera tight pants. She sauntered about pilfering out sultry looks and pouty sniffles to all the boys in the booths along the walls. I could tell she was a regular by the way the table full of girls in alternately sequined and satin tube tops curled their collective upper lip at her. I must say, that most of the chicks at that bar looked like absolute shit. And don�t judge me for judging them. They wanted to be noticed. Why else would someone wear a pink and black horizontally striped tunic with a sparkly head wrap dangling from their stringy hair? Seriously � the 80�s slapped that bitch upside the head and made her think she looked cool. I think I may have to frequent that place just to make myself feel better about my drab Nanna Public wardrobe. It�s Not Unusual � Tom Jones � 4 stars.
I just returned from a three hour meeting. Let�s say it together� Three. Hour. Meeting. It was quite surreal to be honest with you. At one point, I was looking over the shoulder of the client with the view of a fine art painting of two dogs standing at point on one end of the spectrum and a local news personality at the other end. Words were filtering in and out of my brain and crossing paths, and as I tried to focus, I heard the local news personality say quite loudly the word �METH�. And seriously folks, uttering the word METH is certainly attention getting. So dogs at point, METH, local news personality, Three. Hour. Meeting. Yeah, my brain was overloaded, and I began to get the unmistakable pointy sharp pain behind the eye that threatens to deliver an earth-shattering migraine headache if not tended to quickly. So as I fumbled in my purse, I realized that sitting behind me is a local sports legend. And suddenly, it occurred to me that every table in the semi-private dining room of this restaurant had some level of Kansas City all-star sitting at the table. How weird is that? Actually � how pathetic is that? We were all dining on overpriced wedges of iceberg lettuce, discussing METH and business deals and all sorts of bullshit. My head hated it. It rebelled. The sharp pointy pain got sharper. Coffee and dessert, thank you, no. I�ll take the check and please let Lizzie know that Janie�s sister-in-law says hi. Country Grammar (Radio Edit) - Nelly � 3 stars (but if I�m in the car by myself, 5 stars).
After writing that, I googled �hunting dogs �at point�� to ensure that I was using the correct hunting dog terminology and after confirming that I was, I hit the image search and four pictures in, discovered the exact piece of art that I had been staring at throughout the meal. So now it is my pleasure to share it with you. Little Green Bag � Barenaked Ladies (featuring Tom Jones) � 5 stars. Yeah, I have more than one Tom Jones song in my mix. You gotta problem with that?
If only I were kidding, but art like this adorned every corner of that restaurant. Very ol� boys club type of place. Can I get you a cigar, a snifter of brandy and a slap on the ass for your secretary? Thankyouverymcuh. Ring of Fire � Johnny Cash � A whole galaxy of stars. All the stars. Love it.
2:57 p.m. - February 18, 2005
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