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And Hootie Don't Mind No Cussin'

Best thing I think I heard yesterday:

"And hootie don't mind no cussin'!"

I really have no earthly idea what that was supposed to mean. In fact, I'm not even sure that I heard it right. A kind southern gentleman from the land of perfectly manicured golf courses uttered that phrase during a business meeting, and I about spewed Diet Coke across the boardroom. And hootie don't mind no cussin... what in the hell could that possibly mean? Was he referring to Hootie of Hootie and the Blowfish? Is hootie a nickname for his wife? What in the hell??? If you are wondering what the context of the phrase was, he was about to say something that was not at all off-color but being the kind southern gentleman, he had to cover his bases. I think he may have alluded to the fact that a lot of money is spent on golf attire. I don't really know. My face was frozen in a pleasant grin as I tried to stifle the waves of laughter building inside of me. And hootie don't mind no cussin'. Seriously. Between that and "I appreciate yo' bling" I'm turning into a phrase-stealing fool!

Ohhhh! Last night, I found something for Holly that Jane doesn't even know about it. Wait - I lied - The Boy spotted it in the window of a store in the mall. Check it out:

Though it is a bit difficult to discern, that, my friends, is a toddler-sized faux fur stole!!! Guess who will be wearing that to cover her little bare shoulders at my November wedding!!! So freakin' cute! The Boy done good in spotting that little gem.

This Just In...

In my guestbook, Jane accused me of trying to draw attention to my breast with a picture that was supposed to be of my hair. In my defense, it is really hard to take a picture of one's own hair. Anywho, after typing today's entry, I looked down and smack dab in the center of my right breast is a spot of that DAMN spaghetti I just threw away. I work for a really nice company that keeps a stash of stain treating towlettes near the water cooler, so I went to retrieve one. When I opened the drawer, I was surprised to see not only the wipe I wanted, but a little trial pack of Sea Breeze. Seriously - Sea Breeze??? This stuff still exists? I'm not that old, but I can still remember the fresh sting of a cotton swab full of that shit on a freshly picked-at zit. Ah the memories... Now to figure out how old that trial packet is - I'll bet if I open it up I'll find a "25 cents off your next purchase of LA Looks styling products" coupon.

Oh, and as an ode to all of my new mom friends, I just had to close the door to my office because the removal of the spaghetti stain created the illusion that I am lactating. Lovely.

12:26 p.m. - September 30, 2004

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